Petriskyisms

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Petriskyisms

Post by The Highlander on Wed Jun 24, 2009 9:14 pm

We all know Petrisky and his terrible metaphors, his laughable attempts at humor (ironic), his downright illogic, and his idiosyncrasies in general. Got a particular example? (Courtney, I'm looking at you here) put it here. Some of them off our old board:
"If you can't count to ten, count to one ten times!"
"Curvilinear" <--Note, it's an actual word.
"Alright guys. Let's go eight steps left to the right."
Two Words: Petrisky's Ringtone (Note, his new phone doesn't have it, so no more 'Stars and Stripes Forever')
"If you're on time you're late!" This one, combined with "You have to be early to be on time" create a rather curious paradox...
"DO NOT MISTAKE MY INTENSITY FOR ANGER! I DO NOT LIKE TO YELL! IT'S NOT IN MY NATURE!!!!!
"Look, a butterfly!" The fact that he actually said that.
"*holding pencil still* I am giving you the beat right here. Look. You're late!"
''Clarinets, hold your clarinets at the correct angle. Look at the baritones!''
*(note: not brought up because of hilarity/unfairness/nonsensicalness, this actually is one of my favorite quotes from him, because he actually criticizes woodwinds, and praises low brass)
''If your eyes aren't on me, then your ears aren't in the room''
"When I was in High School, I got rear ended by a beer-truck.."
"Face backfield and assume the position! "
"Keep long hair up in the helmet. I know, I know. I had long hair when I was in highschool." Shocked
"All of your smiling faces are in my office!"
"The more we play the sooner we get done."
" Your always under the microfying..er, The microscope AND the magnifying glass, or whatever.. "
Okay, so here's the situation:
Band Rocks out to a Christmas Compilation Music Piece, and the trumpets get to 'Rudolph' with bell mutes. Petrisky's dancin' and directin', and the trumpets all stand up to really feel the music. Abruptly, after that bit, Petrisky cut's off the Music. He just stares at the trumpets, with a silly grin on his face
Mr.P : Man, I just love that. Oh! No, I didn't stop to tell you that, Mike (tuba) messed up. So Mike..

Twas funny.
''Ninja Trumpet!''
"Don't worry the tuba's aren't heavy, they're just really big,bulky, and hard to move."
"They say, Mr. Petrisky LIVES in the band hall..
In one of the storage rooms, he keeps a modified tuba case he uses for a bed!
He drinks valve oil, and eats slide grease and flutes.. freshmen flutes."
--exurb from Band Horror story told during the 'Band Lock-in'
"anyway so im standing there eating a pink frosted sprinckle donut talking to Alan and Mr. Petrisky walks up and says "Homer Simpson would be jealous"." --Dingo
"That's What She Said." Shocked
"So, random Petriskyism from a couple weeks ago.
We were playing along and there was a p in the music and we played f. He stopped us and said he should feel a piano hitting him in the head, not a forte like a slap in the face.

I want to know how a piano is better than just a slap? " --Andrew
"Curlicule"
Mr. Petrisky is great. he was talking to the french horns about stopping or whatever
"Imagine, you're a train, and there's a kitten on the tracks, so you immediately STOP!"
"Um, sir, trains don't work like that"
"Then, you're the energizer bunny, and all of a sudden, you run out of batteries!"
"*sigh*"
--Tia
Regarding the mock AP testing week, "It's like an 800 pound gorilla came to swipe everyone away."

_________________
I know the sound of each rock and stone, And I embrace what others fear.
You are not to roam, In this forgotten place; just the likes of me are welcome here.
Everything breathes, and I know each breath; for me it means life, for others it's death.
It's perfectly balanced, perfectly planned. More than enough, for this man. Like every tree
stands on its own, reaching for the sky, I stand alone. I share my world, with no one else.
All by myself, I stand alone
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*sniff*

Post by Katharine on Fri Jun 26, 2009 1:27 am

I miss band already. Sad
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Re: Petriskyisms

Post by MadChickenz on Fri Jun 26, 2009 8:58 pm

Hey, look! It's Katharine. Yay! Smile
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Re: Petriskyisms

Post by Katharine on Sat Jun 27, 2009 12:43 am

Hey, look! It's Andrew. Yay! Smile
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Re: Petriskyisms

Post by That Cool Person on Sat Jun 27, 2009 3:22 pm

So, Katharine, how's life over there?
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Re: Petriskyisms

Post by The Highlander on Sat Jun 27, 2009 5:04 pm

...Needs to be in another place, this is for Petriskyisms. Try to stay on topic.

_________________
I know the sound of each rock and stone, And I embrace what others fear.
You are not to roam, In this forgotten place; just the likes of me are welcome here.
Everything breathes, and I know each breath; for me it means life, for others it's death.
It's perfectly balanced, perfectly planned. More than enough, for this man. Like every tree
stands on its own, reaching for the sky, I stand alone. I share my world, with no one else.
All by myself, I stand alone
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The Highlander


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Re: Petriskyisms

Post by That Cool Person on Sat Jun 27, 2009 5:23 pm

Sorry. I'm not used to staying on topic.
But here, I have some:

"I believe I'm experiencing phantom dynamics."
"We're playing Angel's food cake and not Devil's food cake!"
"It's an Italian day; eat spaghetti."
"...it sounds like a truck with a flat tire on the highway"
"We are going to perform musical surgery."
"The notes are gooey here: they stick together like bubblegum."
"Wrap your notes in emotion!"
"CIRCLE IT IN BLOOD." *Petrisky glare*
"I bought a whole chocolate bar and you only gave me one square."
"It shouldn't sound like you're shingling a roof."
"Don't get in the water, like off the coast of Australia, with a cut."


Last edited by That Cool Person on Sat Jun 27, 2009 7:37 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Re: Petriskyisms

Post by That Cool Person on Sat Jun 27, 2009 5:43 pm

"If I get angry e-mails... I'll be one upset Hungarian!" Ben, "Aargh! Petrisky smash!"
"It's like stepping in gum stuck on the sidewalk on a hot day. Ewwwwwwwww!"
"I don't care if you can ace this next test with half your brain tied behind your back and one eye open!"
"You should play like you're singing a lullaby to a baby, not like you're working a jackhammer!" (after playing) "You must hate babies."
"Turn on the headlights, then turn on the brights."
"I feel like a long-tailed cat in a room full of rocking chairs."
"Grab from the bottom of the chair!" *glares at low brass* "Not from the hair!!"
"You are a tear in the fabric of the band tempo."
"Trumpets! You are rushing like a bunch of crazed hair dryers!" Mike G. "Um, sir, what exactly is a crazed hair dryer?"
"You're playing is like eating with too much of a spice, of too many hot peppers on your food." Mike G. "OH! Like wasabi!"
"What do you do when you run out of air?" *Asks several kids unsatisfied with their answer. * Finally, "Um... Take a breath?" Director, "Genius!" -2nd Region Band Director

Stay tuned.


Last edited by That Cool Person on Sat Jun 27, 2009 7:38 pm; edited 1 time in total
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Re: Petriskyisms

Post by The Highlander on Sat Jun 27, 2009 6:07 pm

No pun intended, I hope. : P

_________________
I know the sound of each rock and stone, And I embrace what others fear.
You are not to roam, In this forgotten place; just the likes of me are welcome here.
Everything breathes, and I know each breath; for me it means life, for others it's death.
It's perfectly balanced, perfectly planned. More than enough, for this man. Like every tree
stands on its own, reaching for the sky, I stand alone. I share my world, with no one else.
All by myself, I stand alone
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The Highlander


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Re: Petriskyisms

Post by That Cool Person on Sat Jun 27, 2009 7:40 pm

I didn't even catch that pun. lol

"Band directors are like family physicians. We look at you, figure out what's wrong, then send you to a specialist (a.k.a. private lesson teachers)."
"We want to be like a soft plane landing, not a hard one that goes eeeeerrrereeeeeeerrrrrereeeerrrrrrrrrrr!"
"An ensemble is like a find tuned watch: it all has to fit just right."
"Tonguing wrong is like running a race wearing concrete boots. You're only going *thump**thump**thump* and not making an progress."
"It's like laying down a foundation to a house without having engineers check the soil. The house is just going to go *pbbbbt* and sink."
"It's like letting go of a helium balloon, not a brick."
"It's like walking in wearing a red shirt when everyone else is wearing a blue shirt: it just doesn't go."
"You're leaving just a bit of juice in the container. That is so aggravating."
"Be the pig!" -Badrack
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Re: Petriskyisms

Post by That Cool Person on Sat Jun 27, 2009 7:50 pm

I have an entire page crammed with quotes coming soon. The rest of you can feel free to add on. Please
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Re: Petriskyisms

Post by Katharine on Sun Jun 28, 2009 1:27 am

Wow. Nice memory.
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Re: Petriskyisms

Post by The Highlander on Sun Jun 28, 2009 3:48 pm

We/She wrote a ton of them down as they happened.
But, my page is currently in my locker... Neutral
So I can't post any. Yet.

_________________
I know the sound of each rock and stone, And I embrace what others fear.
You are not to roam, In this forgotten place; just the likes of me are welcome here.
Everything breathes, and I know each breath; for me it means life, for others it's death.
It's perfectly balanced, perfectly planned. More than enough, for this man. Like every tree
stands on its own, reaching for the sky, I stand alone. I share my world, with no one else.
All by myself, I stand alone
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The Highlander


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Re: Petriskyisms

Post by That Cool Person on Sun Jun 28, 2009 4:13 pm

Yeah, other than this page I know I have more. The problem is I'm not sure where...

Though, now that I'm a DM I won't always be in the room to write down what he says, nor will I have paper and a pencil to write it on. I'll really need your help (your being everyone in band).
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Re: Petriskyisms

Post by Katharine on Sun Jun 28, 2009 4:58 pm

Oooo so you're Courtney...

And which Ben was it that said "Petrisky smash?
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Re: Petriskyisms

Post by That Cool Person on Sun Jun 28, 2009 6:47 pm

Mark has to answer that; he wrote it down.
I would guess Ben Lawrence though (I'm not sure if that's how you spell his name...)
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Re: Petriskyisms

Post by MadChickenz on Mon Jun 29, 2009 11:17 pm

L-a-u-r-e-n-c-e. And yes, I'm pretty sure it was him. Don't know what other Ben would say something like that.
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Re: Petriskyisms

Post by Katharine on Tue Jun 30, 2009 1:29 am

:/ Ben Gentry would.
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Re: Petriskyisms

Post by That Cool Person on Tue Jun 30, 2009 9:56 pm

Ben "L-a-u-r-e-n-c-e" is the only Ben who's ever spoken out in class like that.
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Re: Petriskyisms

Post by The Highlander on Fri Jul 03, 2009 1:46 pm

Got two here, fresh from today:
"Sometimes your right foot is silent."
"When two or more people are talking, no communication is taking place."

_________________
I know the sound of each rock and stone, And I embrace what others fear.
You are not to roam, In this forgotten place; just the likes of me are welcome here.
Everything breathes, and I know each breath; for me it means life, for others it's death.
It's perfectly balanced, perfectly planned. More than enough, for this man. Like every tree
stands on its own, reaching for the sky, I stand alone. I share my world, with no one else.
All by myself, I stand alone
avatar
The Highlander


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Re: Petriskyisms

Post by That Cool Person on Fri Jul 03, 2009 9:11 pm

Ok, someone help me with this one, it was said today and it was something like 'only losers aren't listening.' Pretty much the whole band laughed though.
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Re: Petriskyisms

Post by The Highlander on Sat Jul 04, 2009 12:07 pm

Yeah, something like that. Either that or "All talkers are losers", "Only losers are talkers", something to that effect. It was really weird, and kinda funny, hearing Petrisky say that.

_________________
I know the sound of each rock and stone, And I embrace what others fear.
You are not to roam, In this forgotten place; just the likes of me are welcome here.
Everything breathes, and I know each breath; for me it means life, for others it's death.
It's perfectly balanced, perfectly planned. More than enough, for this man. Like every tree
stands on its own, reaching for the sky, I stand alone. I share my world, with no one else.
All by myself, I stand alone
avatar
The Highlander


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Re: Petriskyisms

Post by That Cool Person on Sat Jul 04, 2009 3:53 pm

Well, I like "All talkers are losers." I'll use that one unless anyone remembers exactly what he said.
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Re: Petriskyisms

Post by Thor-Axe the Impaler on Thu Jul 16, 2009 9:21 pm

Was it Petrisky or Badrak that used the donut metaphor?
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Re: Petriskyisms

Post by That Cool Person on Fri Jul 17, 2009 6:47 pm

Mr. P
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